Obama's Brother Tried to Rape 13-Year Old Girl, Denied Visa in Britain

Since everyone thinks it is so funny to joke about family members (I'm referring to Letterman, who went on TV and made jokes about how funny it would be if Palin's 14 year old daughter was sexually assaulted by a baseball player), here is a funny one for you- Did you hear the one about how Obama's brother tried to rape a 13-year old girl?

Actually, it's not a joke, it's just a joke that you never heard about it before, because I am sure you have heard about the family of most Republican politicians (Palin, Bush, McCain, Cheney).

According to Reuters, President Obama's brother was denied a visa to come back to Britain because he is accused of attempted sexual assault on a 13-year old girl. British police arrested Samson Obama, who lives in Kenya, last November after he allegedly tried to sexually assault a young girl, but then he apparently fled the country and has not returned.

Last seen attending Barack Obama's inauguration party (probably hanging out with Obama's illegally-living-in-the-US aunt) and attending swanky functions paid for by his brother, the President, Obama gave officers a false identity at the time of his arrest, claiming to be Henry Aloo, the report said. He was fingerprinted but not charged and left Britain. It is unclear where he went, but it is believed that he is to have taken a connecting flight to the United States in January. I wonder if someone could check the visa records on this and see why we let this Obama guy into our country if he is accused of rape.

The White House was informed, but had no comment on the many crimes of the President's brother. A White House official said the president had not spoken with Samson in 20 years, which is surprising since he was at the inauguration party. The only evidence I see of them in my limited search is the attached picture, but that looks 20 years old, so I guess we'll have to take the President on his word that he shuns his family and refuses to even talk to his relatives.

Thanks to Jim Treacher for mentioning this on his blog.

UPDATE: Some people have emailed me, jabbering about how Samson Obama is "only Obama's half-brother"- but that still means they are brothers, right? And since when do 'halves' matter with Obama- I seem to remember the papers mentioned once or twice that Obama was black, but in reality he is only half-black (his mother was white), and no one seems to go around calling Obama 'half-black'.