Primary Election Results 2008

Here is my slant on some of the primary election results of 2008 for my little corner of the woods in southeast Michigan...

U.S. Rep. Carolyn Cheeks Kilpatrick narrowly won re-election in a three-way Democratic primary by touting her personal character and family values, as reflected in her accused felon son, Detroit Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick. In humility for voters humbly returning her back to office, she declared "I will be your congresswoman ... until I decide to retire."

Voters in Oakland, Macomb, and Wayne counties voted to tax themselves further to bail out the Detroit Zoo, after it was inefficiently ran into the ground under the City of Detroit's management. Even though zoo patrons are charged to enter the zoo, now they have to pay a tax too, and so does everyone else who doesn't go to the zoo. Every taxpayer loses $10, every animal gains several thousands. As one person commented "I'll pay taxes for the things that I want"- and make everyone else also pay taxes for the things that I want.

Elsewhere in these recession-wrecked counties, voters passed every single tax that was available to put on themselves, as homeowners decided to fund a senior center, give more money to schools, and limit traffic flow and reduce streets to increase commerce. Seriously. I'm sure that combined with the recent massive tax increases at the state level, Michigan will continue its stellar attempt to widen its lead as the worst state in the nation.

The only good news out there is that I won in my race. At least voters have some sense.